Tuesday, May 28, 2013

“The Bachelorette”: Stephen’s top 10 list

bachelorette-desiree

Rachel: I am so glad that the Bachelorette has returned for a new season! I think Desiree is stunning, and I can’t wait for her to find a lasting love (hopefully)! She welcomed 25 new guys (and one 4-year-old) on the show last night, and as usual, they are half good, half bad. My Stephen is often coerced into watching with me.

These are Stephen’s TOP 10 THINGS THE GUYS SHOULDN’T HAVE DONE:

10. Mention how Desiree was a contestant last season.

I’m sure the last thing Desiree wants to talk about is how Sean let her go, how her brother lost her the rose that night, or how watching last season makes the new contestants feel like they know her. This is the here-and-now boys.

9. Assume Desiree’s penny from last season is still in the mansion fountain.

Granted, this one turned out okay. I felt a little tense when he kept looking for the penny though. I don’t like being nervous for the guys during the intros.

8. NOT give Desiree some homework when meeting her.

This is a double negative: I want to applaud Will from Chicago and his nickname-giving. He told Desiree that she would have to come up with a nickname for him later on in the night. This ensures she will think about him after he leaves. (Also calling her Athena is a multi-layered compliment of the classic variety.)

7. Think shock value equals creativity.

Not wearing a shirt? Not creative. Go on “Bachelor Pad” if you want to show-boat like that.

Wearing a suit of armor? Sweet thought, but it pigeon-holed you. As the guy who wore a suit of armor.

Magic tricks? This isn’t my seventh birthday party. But the napkin rose into a real rose was awesome. As was the disappearing-Desiree trick. Carpe Diem.

6. Be TOO creative.

Guys who dressed down to show their normalcy, or dressed up in a tux with Doc Martens to show they’re serious but ready to party, or faked a proposal just to tie their shoes—all made good impressions with their creative choices. They got roses.

Guy who went too far: The “make my own, mismatched, yet memorable suit jacket.” I liked it. I remember him. His name was Micah. I think. He tied it in well with her creativity from last season. But he didn’t get a rose. Or any air-time after his initial introduction.

5.5: Not be creative at all.

This is a shout out to all the guys who said “Hi, you look pretty. Can’t wait to talk to you inside.” I forgot who you are before you even got in the house. Happens at least . . . three times each season.

5. Equate your desire to come court the Bachelorette with deciding whether or not to kick or receive at a football game. A coin toss? Really?! Red Flag. 

4. Say you’re best friends with your kid’s mom, but imply that even that wasn’t a good enough reason to get married. (Even though I’m sure you’ll say you want to marry your best friend somewhere along the line.) Red Flag.

3. Say “For the right reasons”

I have serious problems with “Bachelor/Bachelorette” buzzwords or phrases. “For the right reasons” is right up there near the top. I only had 55 minutes this season before I heard it.

2. Keep trying to use the “Fantasy Suite” approach long after it didn’t work the first time.

It was pretty obvious Desiree didn’t like the whole “Fantasy Suite on the first night” idea. Granted, as an idea, it wasn’t that bad—but the delivery and intent behind it was horrible. If it was a joke, it could’ve been awesome: take something from the show, put it out of context, and create a new, clever opportunity for conversation. However, it’s obvious Jonathan had other things in mind.

1. Make the Bachelorette console YOU and your feelings . . . on the first day.

Larry, the ER doctor: the poor, heartfelt, yet ultimately doomed ER doctor, didn’t have a chance after his dance moves failed. He could have—it wasn’t insurmountable. However, he never got past it. I feel for Larry. His low point came when Desiree had to make him feel better about it. This is a “Bachelor” staple: “I don’t know how he/she feels about me, I’m so confused about your feelings, reassure me about your feelings for me” —but it usually comes in week five. You have to be upbeat during the first night, no matter what.

 

I (Rachel) can’t wait to see where this season goes! My favorite guys from episode 1 are: Robert, Ben, and Drew. Good luck, Desiree!!

7 comments:

  1. This post is awesome and very true! I love Stephen's perspective on the guys and I felt bad for the ER doctor. Thanks for linking up hope to see you next tursday!

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  2. I am looking forward to more of these posts :)

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    1. :) He does have some pretty good insights!

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  3. LOVE your husband's commentary!! A lot of the stuff he said is so true.

    When the guy who was looking for her penny in the fountain, I just kept saying, give it up dude! You look like a dummy! And the guy who didn't wear a shirt? I actually threw up in my mouth a little. So gross.

    I'm looking forward to your husband's thoughts next week!! Thanks for linking up girl!

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  4. Love this!!! I totally agree with Ben's baby mama BFF is a giant red flag. Yes with the buzzwords too, lol. It is so true that you need to have the right balance of creativity, or you're toast! I am so looking forward to reading all your recaps this season :)

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  5. I meant to mention this while we were Skyping and I forgot! I refuse to get suckered in to this season! Haha Andrew keeps saying that he's waiting on me to give in because he knows I love it. ;) But I love how you had your husband write this. My favorite quote.. "Magic tricks? This isn’t my seventh birthday party." Too funny! ;)

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  6. This was so fun to read! I just watched last night and thought some of the guys were goobers but a few of them really shined. I really like Bryden, Chris, and Dan. They all seem really sweet and normal lol... unlike shirtless, suit of armor, and magic tricks :) I also felt so bad for Larry. That was a cute move and it's too bad that was the last impression. Also don't you think Robert and Drew look alike? Kinda? Haha, anyways, as usual I'm excited for the next episode!

    ps. love the blog re-do! Looks awesome!

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Thank you so much for your comments! I enjoy reading each one, and if you ask me a question, I will respond below it :) Thanks again!!

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