I'm calling this 18 weeks, but actually, I'll be 19 tomorrow! We are SO excited about this little one, our sweet number three. The weeks are breezing past at this point, but I can't say that this pregnancy in general has felt fast.
Going back to the beginning. . .
I was pregnant with a baby at the end of January, and I miscarried on February 29th. The loss was devastating. Our family, friends, blog friends, church - all commiserated with us and shared in our sadness. We were lifted up in prayer by so many people, and in turn, God began to give us peace. We had to wait 6 weeks until we could try again, and it was a really long 6 weeks. I remember telling Steve that I needed some kind of hobby or creative outlet to keep my mind off of the waiting. I didn't feel like I received much medical or emotional care from my doctor's office. In fact, the office never even gave me a chance to speak to the actual doctor. I had some friends who advised trying for another baby right away because they had success quickly, and others who advised waiting a while for healing. For me, I knew that I wouldn't be happy until I was pregnant again. And I hoped and prayed that it wouldn't take us 6 months of trying, like it had with all three of our pregnancies.
Nolan and Ephraim kept me absolutely busy for those weeks. I took a break from the blog so that I could spend my evenings with Steve, just watching TV and relaxing.
On April 22, we saw a positive pregnancy test! It was such a miracle that we were able to conceive on the first try. Again, I credit this all to the prayers prayed for us, and the hope that surrounded us. It puts us 10 weeks behind the first pregnancy, with a due date of December 31st. God is so good.
Experiencing the first trimester is totally different after you've had a miscarriage. You live with a certain amount of fear. You get nervous with every trip to the bathroom. You don't let yourself form a deep attachment with the baby until you have a little bit more certainty that this pregnancy will stay. The first few weeks were tough, but I began to feel peace once the symptoms started appearing.
During week five, I developed major food aversions. In fact, even though I was so hungry during weeks five through ten, nothing sounded good. I would browse the whole grocery store and still not find anything I wanted. My taste buds were all wrong. Salty food was way too salty, and sweet food was awfully rich. Once we got past six weeks, I gradually became more and more optimistic about this pregnancy. We took it one day at a time.
We waited a little longer to tell people about this baby. We liked having our little secret, and we also wanted to make sure everything was fine on the first ultrasound (it was!)
Right now, I'm really enjoying the second trimester. I've been able to feel the baby's tiny kicks and punches for about four weeks now. My appetite is all back, and I haven't had too many crazy cravings or aversions lately. I've gained about ten pounds, and I'm just getting my maternity clothes out of the attic. The veins in my right leg are purple and popping out, and so I try to wear my compression stockings when it's not quite so hot outside. Other than that, everything is going really well, and we look forward to our big ultrasound later this month :)
The boys are convinced that the baby is a girl, and they want her name to be Emily. Nolan loves to kiss and hug the baby bump every chance he gets, and it's adorable. He really changed his tune from when he told me, "Two babies is enough. You only have enough love for two, Mommy." Now, I think he's very excited to experience becoming a big brother again. Ephraim, on the other hand, has no idea that his world will change in December.
I'll try to get updates up every two weeks or so. We really are so excited, and in the meantime, we're enjoying these last few months as a family of four :)